Anger is the base emotion. Frustration and Agony are the derived emotions from Anger. So I will talk about Anger and probably rest will be covered automatically. Question is why does one become angry? From my experience almost in all the situations one becomes angry only when we have expectations which are not met. These expectations can be from colleague, relative, friend, or even with oneself. So the simple way to control the Anger is not to have expectations.
Come on… it is impractical to not have expectations from anyone.
Well next best thing that can be done is FORGIVE. One has to understand that everyone is human and it is possible to make mistakes. So if we are able to forgive people for their mistakes then Anger can be avoided.
Forgiving others is important however it is even more important to forgive oneself, if an individual is not able to forgive himself then also he becomes angry, irritating.
forgiving oneself is v important..Agree on the expectation part also, expectations ho jaati hain, its a natural feeling and nothing is wrong with it..however try limiting it, as more expectations generally lead to more hurt..BUt again if someone comes upto expectations u feel good , elated..
ReplyDeleteForgiving others, is always where i had a problem. what to do with repeated offenders? Sometimes also when you don't show anger/offence, then you are considered weak and get rolled over....
I follow, learn and forget approach..
I completely agree on showing anger projected offended. I think it is important to let people know what you did not feel good about. As far as the emotions you are projecting are under your control and you know you are projecting the emotions that you would want to, it is fine. Issue comes in when we unknowingly project emotions. So if there is a need to show that you are not happy about anything, I think you should do that.
ReplyDeleteComing to forgiving others, identify the number of time you yourself would have made a mistake and someone (including your parents) forgiven you. Thereafter do an introspection on how did you feel about it and also how the other person would have felt about it.
Each one of make blunders and sometime repeatedly, but do you do that intentionally or they happen by mistake. Mistakes should be forgiven while if you feel someone is intentionally trying to hurt you tell them that you did not like it and LET IT GO. Keeping anger within you is not good for you and if someone is trying to hurt you then that is probably what he wants (to make you angry). One should keep ourselves protected by such attacks.
Interesting !
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